Hey there, everybody! Autumn is almost over, winter is coming, and some folks might say it’s time to be moody and serious (with the weather and whatnot). Well, not in my book! To lighten the mood, I wanna tell y’all a couple of funny stories that happened to people in Toyota dealerships across the US.
That’s right – we all had our fair share of funny/not so much experience with dealers, and I hope my post will at least bring a smile to your faces. Let’s roll!
And by the way, if you are eager to find out more about the best dealers of my favourite car brand in each state of America, see this really HUGE and FULL post about Toyota Dealerships in the USA.
1 – I Swear I’ll Kill You If You Don’t Stop Swearing
Alright, so, the first one is a personal story.
Back in the day (like way, way back) I used to work at my uncle’s Toyota dealership. That was right about the time when Toyota Tacomas were the hottest thing on the market and customers were literally in a line waiting to get one. We were a rather small establishment and had only a couple of them in the lot, so, every new Tacoma was sold literally right off the trailer. Now, there was this guy I owed some money to and I promised to pay him back with a good Tacoma deal, but I couldn’t, because, as I said, we were on a short supply. Therefore, the dude was threatening to send his elder brother to get the money from me. And so, by the end of the work hours, even though we were both super tired, I was really happy that nobody came for the money (I didn’t want my uncle to see it).
However, before I was about to leave, this tall and scary fella walked in, and, before I could say anything, he shouted REALLY loud: “Where my product at, boy!? » To say that I was scared is to say nothing. I didn’t know what to say, and Uncle Frank was coming in to the noise, so I thought that was it for me. However, my uncle lighted up when he saw him and yelled back “I Swear I’ll Kill You If You Don’t Stop Swearing!” and the two just started laughing like crazy. Turns out they were old friends and had an inside joke, so to speak. They both knew about my story with that guy and decide to prank me… That was cruel! The next day I went on and paid the other dude back his money, and everything was alright. I know that the story may sound funny to you know (or not), but it was a really scary experience for me!
2 – Check Before You Leave
So, this old guy wants to get a sweat deal on his rusty old car.
The dealer asks him to hand over the keys for a test-drive check-up.
The older guy gives him the keys, and goes on and on for 15 minutes telling him that the price better be good because the brakes are brand-new – right off the body shop. So, the dealer guy hops in, takes the car for a spin. However, he’s having a near-death experience when the vehicle failes to stop at the worst possible moment. He calles a guy he knows and together they see that the car has ABSOLUTELY NO BRAKES!
He goes back (on foot) and starts yelling at the old man all kinds of “sweat words” for almost having him killed. The old-timer doesn’t feel guilty a bit and “sweat-talkes” him back pointing to the set of new brakes in the rear seats. “I just never got them installed, that’s all”. Obviously, the dealer never bought the car 🙂
3 – Babies Always Help
This is one of those funny life situations – happened a while ago.
So, there was this young and beautiful woman who was breastfeeding her child.
And she was sitting in the financial department negotiating a deal on a new car. Now, the guy who was “working” with her was rather distracted. The thing is, he could see her beautiful…chest right in front of him – all the time. I don’t know if this nice lady was doing it on purpose or not, but my friend (who works there) and all his colleagues were watching it all from the tower and laughing their asses off! The dealer was a really nice guy, a family man, so, you can understand the situation he was in, huh?
The whole thing went for about half an hour and the woman left the dealership with a very good deal (obviously the guy was ready to agree to any terms only to finish the deal).
Babies help, right?
4 – Double Score
I’m not sure where this one is true or not – it’s just a story we tell each other when me and my friends (all guys) gather together for a beer or two: A young couple comes into a Toyota dealership and tells the sails guy they want to test-drive a bunch of cars from the lot.
They’re taking their time (almost 6 hours), and the guy from the staff is right there with them, explaining every little detail they ask him about.
He is tired as f**k, but they are some kind of “royalty”, so, he keeps his anger to himself.
The couple actually does buy a car – a Toyota Land Cruiser – and, while the husband is taking care of all the paperwork, the girl asks the guy if he wants to make love to her – together with her husband! Yep, that’s right! Well, the dealer doesn’t lose his cool and says yes, not really thinking clearly.
But the offer isn’t a joke – it’s for real! They have sex, and the couple becomes the dealership’s most frequent client…This story allegedly happened in LA, so, the next time you’re around, you might think twice to go in…
5 – Hot And Cold, Up And Down
Another story from my buddies who work at Toyota dealerships. The guy – Chris – works at a dealership that has an automatic car wash, and it’s 100% free to customers who have bought a car. One fine day (a super-cold winter day) a young (and pretty) girl in a Toyota Corolla stops to ask him a question.
She: Sorry, sir, is the car wash closed today?
He: Yes, miss, sorry; we always close it when it’s cold like today, because the machine doesn’t dry the vehicles. As you could imagine, when the car hits the road wet, the water goes ahead and freezes off and people literally get stuck in their vehicles with the doors/windows frozen like crazy.
She: You know what – that doesn’t make any sense whatsoever! Are you people dumb? Don’t you use hot water!?
He: No, we’re not. And yes, we do. But…you do know how water behaves though, right?..
She: I don’t get what you’re implying…
He: Well, what do you think: can hot water freeze or not?
She looks at him for a couple of seconds, looks at the car wash, says nothing and leaves.
6 – Sometimes They Just Want To Overpay
An old couple is back from test-drive, it’s all good. The dealer is going over the price with them.
Dealer: Alright, folks, with the trade and money down, I can guarantee roughly about 400 dollars for the standard edition, and 440 dollars for the feature-packed model.
The man: That’s not right – we were only ready to spend 500-550 dollars on it every month!
Dealer: Yeah, but…
The wife: Like he said, young man, you won’t get anything more than 550 from us.
Dealer (a bit surprised, to say the least): No, you don’t understand – you’ll have to pay less than 500, even for the higher trim.
The man (pretty angry): Do you not hear me? 500 dollars! What part of that don’t you get?
Dealer: Certainly, folks! I’ll make it 500 dollars for ya. How does that sound?
The wife: See, that’s what we’re talking about! Thank you, my dear, we’ll take it!
7 – Check The Back, Maybe?
A lady in her 40’s enters a Toyota dealership in Arkansas and asks to show her the most spacious car for her kids to feel comfortable in. The dealer recommends the Highlander, and she goes ahead and buys it. Two days later the lady (who was pretty nice the very first day) calls the dealership and starts to yell all kinds of abusive words (inappropriate for a woman and a mother) because one of the tires went bad and there was no spare in the trunk. The dealer apologies extensively and promises to send an emergency crew right away.
The lady says “No” and spitefully tells the man that since she didn’t find a spare tire in the trunk she just had to use the one on the back of the car…
Alright, that’s my 7 crazy dealership stories for y’all. If you enjoyed them, hit me back so I can post more. And, of course, share your personal funny/crazy stories in the comments!